Look at you
So handsome, so successful
So intelligent, so sexy.
Look at you
Making me feel loved and desired
Making me feel interesting and relevant.
Look at you
Ignoring me for a week
Pretending I don’t exist
And plotting to make me believe
That I’m the issue.
Now look at me
Crying alone
Overthinking bad things about myself
Hating my existence
Suffering from rejection
Having my wound reopened
Because nobody ever wanted me
Because I’m so fucking big that I can’t fit in anyone’s world.
Look at me
Knowing that at the first crumb of affection that you give me will bring me back to the light
Knowing that I accept anything to survive.
Look at me
Losing again
Being the problem
And being abandoned.
